About Me

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I am twenty-four years old, I love to read, write, sing, listen to music, watch theater, open presents, hike, and climb. The number one thing I dislike is lazy people. My goal in life over job, or money, or travel, is to overcome the struggles of the past, and become a whole, happy woman.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Today is Easter and religion confuses me.

Being from Oklahoma I have adopted the stereotypical religion of southern baptist from an early age. Going to church with my family every Sunday taught me, we don't dance, we don't watch movies that are rated anything other than G(especially not Harry Potter and the witch craft in that movie), we don't date, touch, kiss, think about sex, and if we disobey any of these things we should always and forever feel guilty about how we have corrupted ourselves and we will surely go to he'll and never be forgiven in God's eyes.

Now don't let me fool you into thinking I don't believe in God. I do, no doubt in my mind that God exists and he loves everyone on the earth. I hate church. Being raised in church and being raised in public schools you soon learn, they are the SAME. The people who are beautiful and involved are popular, and there are already pre-established clicks that are hard to get into and hard to maintain.

I am not denying that there aren't good churches here in Oklahoma or good churches in America for that matter, but I really don't think I've been to one where I wasn't looked down upon for not being more involved, or for wearing crazy clothes instead of sweaters. A year and a half ago I was going through a hard time with my dead end job and complicated relationship, and so I went to church. I came in with a fake smile plastered to my sad face, I sat down on a middle row with my bible and waited to feel something. No one greeted me, sat by me or even looked at me. Wasn't that what church was for? To help? I suppose I should've said something to somebody, but everyone was so busy talking to the people they already knew. Both of our faults, but I haven't really been back but to go with my grandpa when my mom can't.

I wonder if it's possible to just believe in God and to love eachother? Because everyone has a problem with some religion, some race, some opinion. I guess that's what makes us unique. I'll say it, I don't love everyone, and I should.

Any who, Happy Easter, enough of my "Rabble, rabble, rabble"

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